The top ten effects of ElNino on Saint Vincent College:
10: Bookstore unable to freeze prices.
9: Ice skating event on pond unsuccessful.
8: SGA denies funding to polar bear club.
7: Warm fronts at the salad bar.
6: Upper dorms colder than usual because it's not cold enough to turn heat on.
5: Source of ElNino traced back to Wimmer Hall.
4: Little-known retractable roof on Alcuin to be opened for beach party.
3: Security giving parking tickets to mirages.
2: Spanish class watching The Weather Channel in language lab.
1: Three words: Monk swimsuit issue.