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The top ten signs you'll never get a girl...
(I've done my research on this one!)
10: During homecoming weekend, a ceremony is held in your honor in the
elevator. You are crowned king of the shaft.
9: You try Singled Out, and everybody leaves the stage before you answer the
first category.
8: They say no before you even open your mouth.
7: Your picture is passed around the school with warnings, but you're not
the stalker.
6: Upon entering a girl's floor, all doors are locked and lights are turned
off.
5: Girls hide in the cemetery at night to avoid you.
4: You find a Genie, and he crawls back into his lamp.
3: Entire floors agree to change their clocks so the prefect can kick you
out.
2: You recieve weekly recruiting calls from the seminary.
1: You ask Woody Eagle for advice.