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The top ten things you won't hear on Woody Eagle's show:

10: Congratulations, you're the tenth caller!
9: No, I refuse to play a Beach Boys song.
8: They might be able to beat the Penguins.
7: And here's another song that sucks.
6: Somebody help! The studio's being invaded by chicks! I can't get rid of them!
5: The studio's working great tonight.
4: Sorry I didn't have time to fill all of your requests tonight.
3: Here's a call from somebody listening all the way over in Rooney.
2: Tonight I'll be staying in the studio after the Penguins game begins.
1: Surgeon general's warning about hugging DJ's.