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The top ten reasons to vote:

10: If nobody wins, they can't blame you.
9: Maybe you'll get a free Dole banana at the polls.
8: Get to play with fancy levers before going outside and telling the guy your vote.
7: After voting, minority status can be helpful on job applications.
6: All that time you spent watching debates, going to rallies, and reading the politics section of newspapers and magazines doesn't go to waste.
5: You have somebody to root for on the news that night.
4: When your grandchildren come home from history class and ask "Who would have voted for an idiot like that, anyway?", you'll have an answer for them.
3: Fr. Martin for president!
2: It'll be fun to pull the new "none of the above" lever.
1: If you die the next day, at least you voted before you went.